Happy Mother’s Day….

Mother’s Day…

When I was a little girl, if I remember correctly it was the fourth grade, Mrs. Wilson was my teacher and I made mother a card for Mother’s Day.  It was made of construction paper, I colored a purple iris on the front, and on the inside, I hand printed this verse…

In all the world
There is no other
Who can take the place,
Of my dear Mother

She saved it always, for fifty some-odd years.  It’s among her personal papers that are stored in the attic.  If I had it down, I would scan it for all of you, but not this year, I’m not ready to go thru her things yet.  Soon I will, but just not yet…

I really don’t have a brain…

I got this email from Carlene this morning -

Hey, Jan,

I love your new and improved window box....very nice indeed.   Thought you might like to correct yourself about your new wooden 'flamingo' from the Baby Store....I'll just bet you it's a STORK

Geezy Pete, of course they are storks.  Duh Jan.  Baby Shop???? Comprende???  I am laughing so hard here, oh I am such a ditz!!!!  Can’t believe I thought the storks were flamingos.  I’m just hopeless…

Jan, p*ssing and moaning about her internet connection….

Arughhhhh, I’m having problems with my internet connection yet again.  This isn’t my first rodeo with my ISP, it happened a few months back, if you all remember, I griped about it constantly, but magically, it “fixed” itself.  For a couple of days now, it’s been sluggish and intermittent, much like before and this morning I awoke to no connection at all.  I called Insight, the little man can’t come until tomorrow.  The technician put me thru the samo bells and whistles loops we always go thru.  Unplug, wait, plug back up, yadayadayada, nothing happened.

Of course, an hour later, it’s working again, not only working, but it’s the speed of light it’s so fast.  But I’m not going to cancel them coming, something is obviously going on here.

And do you know that before  I hung up this morning, that vapid little technician person asked me, “Would you be interested in our phone service, today?”  WTF? INTERESTED IN THEIR PHONE SERVICE???

That was the last straw, I said to her  “Are you kidding me?  Your internet service doesn’t work and you want me to add your phone service????? I don’t think so! Then I hung up.  She probably deleted my service call!  And if she did, I can’t even blame her stupidity on a man!!!!!  And no, I don’t want french fries with my diet coke, either!!!

Sorry guys, just had to vent this dreary  morning in Heavensville.  Sunshine?  Hell no!!!! But it’s been so foggy, we’ve had zero visibility!!!  Whoohoo…..

How two little bundles of fur rule my life….

I have a project I’m enjoying working with on the computer, I’m really interested in what I’m doing, and was going to spend a few more hours tonight working, while the juices are flowing…

But I have two fur kids who are thinking otherwise.  Maggie is standing beside me, jumping up and down like a pogo stick, barking her little head off, Mollie is sitting in the floor just staring at me.

They want me to go to bed.  Maggie barks and looks toward the bedroom, Mollie looks downright mad at me, and so what do I do?  Scold them, tell them to be quiet?  Heavens, no, I could never do that.  Hurt their sweet little  feelings?  No way…

So I’m off to bed, tomorrow is another day, why sit at the computer when I can snuggle with the dogs…

Say G’nite Gracie…

Townies, I have a piece of Heavensville History….

If you grew up in Heavensville, your mother undoubtedly bought your clothes from The Baby Shop.  It was a local institution for years.

It’s been gone since the 80’s, but hubby was at a tag sale last fall and someone was selling these flamingoes.  They were store fixtures from. yep, you guessed it, The Baby Shop…

The two by the waterfall are made of ceramic, the tall one is wooden, and you probably remember them in the store, I know I do.  The wooden one is dirty, and had a broken neck, which LC repaired, we won’t clean it though, it just wouldn’t be right.

So now the ceramic ones are living by the waterfall, and the wooden one is taken to the patio in pretty weather.  I am just thrilled. 

Just what I needed,  more geegaws in the garden.  I’m overflowing, but oh, these are just so special.

It’s almost dark now, but the rain has stopped, so I took bad pictures for you, they’re really dark, but if you click on them, you can see more detail.  I’ll take more when the sun shines.

 

These boxwoods are too pretty to smell like cat pee, but they DO!!!

Last year I had rosemary 0n these pots in the patio, it was huge and it was wonderful, and when you brushed against it, the smell was like a pine forest, but I’m not finding the big plants this year, so I decided that boxwoods would be better anyway, since they winter over.   After several discussions with V about varieties, I chose the english boxwood, because I like the small leaf.  I already have it in the garden, and I totally forgot how it smells like cat pee!

And since these beauties are big, the smell wafts right in your nostrils when you sit at the table.  Oh joy, what have I done now?  I can only hope that the smell will dissipate as summer gets further along.  Either that or it will intensify.  And I sure as hell won’t be brushing against it, as I don’t want to stir it up any more than it already is…

But since they are beauteous, not to mention pricey,  I’ll just light a candle and pretend I don’t smell anything.  Hmmmm, wonder how that’s gonna work out for me???  Oh, I can just hear the boys when they come home, they will tease me relentlessly about the cat pee smell.  Goodness me, Scarlett isn't going to think about it right now….. No siree….  Well, except that I’m in the sunroom typing this entry with the french door open to the patio, and the scent is drifting into the house.  Ohhhhh, Lawdee, the smell is just gawdawful…….

I could wile away the hours
Conferrin' with the flowers
Consultin' with the rain
And my head I'd be scratchin'
While my thoughts were busy hatchin'
If I only had a brain

The Scarecrow, from the Wizard of Oz

Olive Garden Salad Dressing and Breadsticks Recipes…

Heads up on this, ladies.  I found these recipes in my June/July issue of Food Network Magazine, courtesy of my buddy V.  Anyway, if this really tastes like they say it does, you all owe me for rest of your natural born lives.  I mean, let’s face it, most of us would kill for these recipes!!!!!

I posted these on Jan Can Cook, tonight…

Salad and Dressing

Breadsticks

I have a milestone, time to toot my own horn…..

Finally, FINALLY, I have broken thru that same 10 lb. gain and loss window that I’ve been doing for the past year and a half.  I got on the scale this morning and I’m into whole new digits.  Whoo-hoooo.  Haven’t seen this since January ‘08, and that was just for about 10  minutes before I started gaining again.

I’ve now lost 7.7 lbs. since the first of April.  And I’ve done it despite have the most sluggish metabolism imaginable!   I attribute my loss to the fact that  I tweet what I eat, every single day, every single morsel that I put in my mouth! It’s  the fact that I publish every single bite  that is keeping me accountable.

I have lots of recipes on my Eating Right blog, including  a ton of archived recipes in the right sidebar, you might get some ideas, too.  Last night I posted a recipe for a fantastic 2 point cornbread  from HungryGirl.  There are also links to other weight loss sites in the right sidebar of EatingRight.  My friend, Roni, has the best site, it’s called GreenLiteBites, and every one of her recipes that I’ve made has been killer.

Here’s a direct link to the tweets, join Twitter and follow me, you might get some ideas, too.  Most of what I eat sounds pretty bad, but once you get into the swing of it, it’s easily doable and the food tastes pretty darn good.  I read those labels, weigh my food on a scale, and try not to eat too much processed food.  For the most part, I’m not hungry,I’m  just being accountable, not eating junk  and not eating out much. 

We all know what a difficult journey this is, and I don’t know how successful I will be, but just for today, right now, it’s working, and for me, that’s quite an accomplishment.

 

Male Vs. Female at the ATM Machine

My neighbor, Larry Lawrence sent me this today.  It is so funny, and unfortunately, a lot of it is so true…

~ jan

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:

"Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the Appropriate steps for your gender."

*******************************

MALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

6. Put window up.

7. Drive off.

*******************************

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

8. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

11. Enter PIN.

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

13. Enter amount of cash required.

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.

17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.

18. Re-check makeup.

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

20. Reverse back to cash machine.

21. Retrieve card.

22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!

23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

25. Redial person on cell phone.

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release Parking Brake.

Necessity is the mother of invention…

I decided my windowbox looked a little lean on both ends, so i trekked off to Lowes in search of a bit of filler.  I bought a box of pink begonias, came home, and realized that water was standing behind the windowbox where I needed to walk to plant.  We’ve had heavy rains for days now in Heavensville, the ground is really saturated.

So, not wanting to go inside and change shoes, I tied grocery bags around my shoes and trudged into the water and planted the fleurs.  Yeah, it worked, I looked silly, but what the hey….

A Saturday morning giggle, something we all can relate to…

Must see movie, coming this summer, Julie & Julia...

Incredible story, makes you think how smart animals really are…

Carlene sent me this, I had to share in case you haven’t seen it. ;o)

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University ..  On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.  He got down on one knee, inspected the elephant’s foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground and then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing, and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly. Probably wasn't the same fucking elephant.

This is for everyone who sends me those heart-warming bullshit stories.

Burton Hillis, do you remember him?

I was looking thru a Better Homes and Gardens from the 60’s, and there was The Man Next Door by Burton Hillis.  Oh my, did that stir memories. 

Judy, Rosemary, Grandpa Hillis, his wife Christine.  I loved to read about them every month.  His real name was William Vaughan, he wrote under the pseudonym Burton Hillis, He was  so folksy and funny,  I enjoyed his columns so much.

I hadn’t thought about him for years.  He died in 1977 at the age of 61 of lung cancer…

Here are some of  his quotes -  

"Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them."

“I'm not convinced that the world is in any worse shape than it ever was. It's just that in this age of almost instantaneous communication, we bear the weight of problems our forefathers only read about after they were solved.”

“Happiness is not a destination. It is a method of life.”

“Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.”

And my favorite -

“The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other.”

Gardening, this is what I've been doing this week...

 

 

 

Is the internet going to run out of bandwidth?

Oh joy, not only do we have to worry about global warming and swine flu, now reports are saying that the internet could run out of bandwidth in the coming years, resulting in sluggish surfing and brownouts.

Heaven forbid, what would we do with our lives if that happened?  In a few short years, this little machine has completely revolutionized the way we communicate, I can’t imagine life without a computer. 

If you’re interested in reading more about this, here’s the link.

~ jan

Unexpected pleasures….

I awoke to rain again in Heavensville.  I planned to do a lot of computer work, but Trish and I decided to go to Compton’s Greenhouse, that’s three trips to the greenhouse for me in the last three days. 

We then stopped by V’s in New Harmony, took a quick tour of the village on her golf cart, ended up eating lunch out, great company, horrible food.

Now  I’m home, smooth jazz is playing, the window is open, the birds are singing, and the breeze is amazing.  A totally unplanned day, sometimes those are the very best of all…

Planting, probably in the rain….

Yesterday was fleur day.  Hubby and I picked up V and went to the greenhouse.  It’s really hard to buy flowers, I want them all, and I don’t have room for everything.  I always have pots crammed with fleurs everywhere on the patio, every year I say I’m cutting back and then I don’t. Those plants are so much more enticing in the greenhouse than they are mid-July when it’s hot and I’m tired of watering.

But buy I did, and today I plant.  But that’s after a visit to the dentist this morning, which I’m dreading like a toothache.  No pun intended….

I’ll be back, hopefully with some pictures for you.  There is nothing like warm spring days, it’s glorious right now in Heavensville.  The fur kids don’t want to come inside, they are loving spring, too…

Okay, I’m outta here, gotta put on my big girl panties and open my mouth wide.  *huge sigh heard around the world*

Busy, busy, busy...

I have so much catching up to do.  I have recipes and pictures to share, but it's late and I'm going to bed.  It was a perfect day.  Ryan and Lindsay were here, we spent most of the day outdoors, went to lunch, it was such a good time.

Tomorrow, I'm off to the greenhouse to buy pretty fleurs.  Life is good, I'll be back soon.

~ jan