Let's continue this trek down memory lane...

It's natural to progress from soap to shampoo and hair products. I was never a Breck girl as a teenager, it didn't have enough suds for my liking. I was a Prell girl. I loved the lather, loved the smell. I always used Prell. And after shampooing, it was time to put in the hair rollers. But oh, no, I didn't use rollers, I used orange juice cans, and are you ready for this... Tampax tubes.

Yep, that's what I did. First of all I had to use some kind of setting agent to stiffen my hair so that I could tease it into heights that would give you a nosebleed. Sometimes I used a product called Dippidy Doo, but I also was a huge fan of.... JELLO!!! Oh yeah, Jello was quite the hair setting product in the 60's. You chose the color closest to your hair color, lemon for blondes, strawberry for redheads, black cherry for brunettes, and you mixed a tablespoon or so of the Jello in water. then sectioned a piece of wet hair, combed in the Jello and sat it on orange juice cans And the Tampax tubes, I put those vertically in front of my ears to make those little corkscrew curls. Talk about a look! And I actually went out in public with a scarf over my head and those orange juice cans in my hair. Well, not the Tampax tubes though, I wasn't THAT stupid...

And heaven forbid if it was a hot day and my head perspired, or I got caught in the rain, because my hair would get sticky! But I did have volume, egads did I ever have volume. I had the highest double bubble you ever saw. A double bubble was when you teased your hair really big and then the back of it had two layers - you combed that bouffant into a big bubble, attached a bow underneath it, had to have the "bow" and then you had another layer that turned under like a page boy. I probably have pictures of that look somewhere.

And twenty years from now, I will probably look back at my hair today, and wonder what I was thinking with all the choppy layers and the hair wax.

But then, twenty years from now, my hair will be blue, no lavendar, and permed! All 15-20 strands of it. *giggle*

Lordy, Lordy do I smell good....

I've had a thing about bars of soap for-ever. When I was a little girl Mother always used Dove. So did my Grandma Short, and at the time I didn't like the smell at all, but now I love it. Brings back great memories. Last year Tonia brought me like fifteen bars of it, and oh how I enjoyed unwrappping those bars and inhaling the scent. I used it in the shower and smiled at the thought that she gave it to me, and just remembered the smells of my childhood.

My Aunt Mae always used Dial, and I still remember visiting her house and washing my hands at the kitchen sink with that gold bar of Dial. I can just see the bar, attached to one of those little round rubber gripper thingies, with the foam running over the edge and down the sink.

When my teenage years rolled around Safeguard came on the market and I was in love. Oh, how I loved the smell of a fresh bar of Safeguard Soap. It's still around, but somehow either the smell isn't as strong as I remembered or my nose just doesn't pick up the scent like it used to.

LC and I got married, and it was Irish Spring time. We used that for years, along with the occasional bar of Zest. Again, it's that strong, sporty clean scent that just rings my chimes. Oh, and I can't leave out soap-on-a-rope. We always had that in the house, but did anybody ever actually use the stuff? I always just used it to decorate the bathroom with. Don't know why I had the urge to decorate my shower, but I was young and dumb...

And of course I bathed my babies in Baby Magic. STILL love that smell, it's just the best EVER.... And Johnson's Baby Powder, and lotion. Oh, the memories those smells bring...

Then entered body wash and I kind of got away from bar soap. I've used so many brands of body wash that I don't really have a favorite. It's good stuff, body wash, it's easy to use, fast, quick, but somehow it's just not the same.

This week I was at the grocery store and on an impulse I picked up a couple of bars of Coast Artic Surf Bath Soap. OMG, I'm in love with bar soap all over again. It's really strong and really fresh and soapy smelling, just totally delightful. They also make it in a body wash, but for now I'm sticking with the bars, just feels right in my hand. Know what I mean, Vern???

So here I sit, freshly showered with my Coast Artic Surf Soap, and I must tell you, I smell mah-velous, dahling....... just mah-velous......

Okay,so this isn't exactly what I had in mind, but...

it'll do in a pinch, I'm not picky, I'll take it...

Okay, I've just gotta jump in on this one...

First of all, all of you who read this blog know that I'm the most non-political person ever. It's just not my thing. I personally believe that the majority of politicans are biased, corrupt and not in office for the good of the common man but to further their own lifestyle and beliefs. Just my opinion....

And I didn't see the big fight between Rosie and Elizabeth on The View yesterday, I just saw snippets of it on the net. I was starting to form an opinion before I saw the argument in it's entirety, and of course you all know that I am NOT an Elizabeth Hasselback fan, and you all know that I AM a Rosie fan, at least I WAS until she went on that obscenity ridden rant in front of those teenagers at that prestigious luncheon a few weeks back. I thought that was totally over the top and wrong and I got off her bandwagon. And I'm not climbing back on, she's just too far out there for me. I do, however, believe she is smart, honest and extremely talented, but she's a little bit too raw for even my taste.

But today I watched that argument in it's entirety and I am now firmly convinced that stupid, ignorant little Elizabeth be-otch is not only out of control, but is so out of touch with reality that she has no idea of what really goes on in the world. You know when you are in an argument with somebody and they become very defensive and won't let anyone speak, they are usually the one that's in the wrong. That's just an observation of a 50's something woman who has been in her share of arguments over the years. And boy would she not let anybody else talk!

And one other thing that really rankles me is why, out of all the people in this wonderful USA, was she chosen to be at Queen Elizabeth's dinner at the White House and sit at a head table with Prince Phillip? What has she ever done to deserve such an honor? It just looks like she is bought and paid for, but there I go being political when I'm not, but it does bother me when there are so many, many deserving people that are so giving of themselves and would have so deserved to be a part of that honor instead of this woman child who has done nothing, in my opinion, to make this world a better place.

If you watch this rant in it's entirety, you can see Rosie trying to stay out of it, and when she does finally speak, she does it in a moderated tone, as much as she can, while Elizabeth is screaming like a banshee. Rosie is a woman that is clearly filled with pain. She is genuinely painfully hurt by this little twit, and Elizabeth could care less. This isn't about politics and who's right and who's wrong, it's about a supposed friendship and someone asking a direct question and the supposed friend totally skirting the issue. I certainly wouldn't want that stupid little vaporhead for a friend. Anybody would be better than her... It will be interesting to watch and see how her perfect little world plays out in the next decade...

Maybe you don't agree with me. Just watch the clip and form your own opinions. You can watch by clicking HERE.

Okay, I'm finished with anything to do with political leanings. I'm back to my silly nonsense from now on, but sometimes, not often, but occasionally I do get my back up. And boy did this woman get my back up!!!!!!

Remember......

When you were a kid, zipping around the neighborhood on your bike. Ang visited today with her Sam, who is a very grown up fourteen now, and just happens to be the CUTEST, SWEETEST, MOST UNASSUMING, ADORABLE teenager I've ever seen, for real she is! I asked if she ever rode her bike and she shot me this look as if to say, "You've got to be kidding!" "Ahhhh," I said, "it's nerdy, huh?"

Its the times, life changes, kids are too sophisticated today. Hubby and I were tooling around in Milly yesterday, laughing at how golf carts remind us of bicycles without the peddling. Going downhill, the wind blowing in your face, you just can't beat it. That's one of the joys about getting old. I'm sure we look "nerdy," riding around on that golf cart with the M&M's, but who cares... It's a wonderful thing, to not really care what people think. One of the "few" perks we get as we age...

I just bet if Sam got on her bike and rode it down "The Hill", this huge old hill in Enfield that is really, really steep and just goes on for-ever, that she would have a big smile on her face. She would go really fast, the wind would be in her face, and she would experience pure joy and a giddy sense of freedom and excitement. It would be a good thing....

And how do I know this? It's because I, too, grew up in Enfield, and I bicycled down that old hill a gadzillion times when I was fourteen, and it WAS a good thing, actually it was friggin' AWESOME!!!

Let's talk....

Ryan has been here for a couple of days, leaving tomorrow for Chicago for a round of meetings. Lindsay is in Seattle visiting her family, LC was working tonight, and Ryan grilled. We actually fired up the charcoal grill, so much better than gas, just a bit more trouble.

Anyhoo, I've talked before about his grilled salad, but if you haven't tried it, make it this summer. Trust me, it's awesome. So easy, too. Just take a head of romaine lettuce, slice it in the middle vertically, LEAVING THE STALK INTACT SO IT WON'T FALL APART. Then you drizzle it with olive oil, salt, pepper, grill it on one side until it starts to char, flip it, and grill the other side. Then drizzle it with balsalmic vinegar, and a squeeze of lemon if that appeals to you, and it's WONDERFUL!!!!!!!

He grilled steaks for LC and himself, fresh salmon for me, sprinkled with dill and lemon juice, and a pan of grilled zucchini/summer squash/peppers/onions, drizzled with olive oil, and grilled in a pan with holes in the bottom until it all carmelized. Oh, it was an amazing meal, just amazing.

I'm just full of jokes today... another great one...

To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - nose height.

Dear beloved pets:

The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate of food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!

To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets:

1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

Remember: In many ways, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3. Are easier to train
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions
9. Don't want to wear your clothes
10. Don't need a "gazillion" dollars for college.

And finally,

11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

Janet sent me this...

I think I've published it before, but it's so funny it's worth repeating...

World's Shortest Fairytale

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl, "Will you marry me"? The girl
said "No" and she lived happily ever after and went shopping, drank
martinis with friends, always had a clean house, never had to cook,
had a closet full of shoes and handbags, and was never farted on.

The End

They are so special....

Just had to share Mother's Day pictures of my family from yesterday. I'm so blessed... And yep, they were dancing on the patio... It's those simple things, girlfriends...

It was a great Mother's Day....

I had a great Mother's Day, hope you all did as well. Ryan and Lindsay were here for the weekend, John and Tonia SURPRISED ME this morning, I didn't think they were going to be able to make it, as they had major yard work this weekend, but they got a lot of it done yesterday and drove in for the day. We relaxed, grilled on the patio, the weather was perfect, LC was home early from work, the M&M's were freshly bathed, life was really good for me today.

And I have to tell you about Georgia Rule last night. Does Georgia really rule???? Well, I, who of course have no taste in movies, loved it. You see, I have such a different take on movies, while most people go for the plot, the storyline, and quality acting, not me. I go because I like a certain actress and I want to see how she's aging, what the women are wearing, their hairstyles, their jewelry, and most of all what the houses look like. I know, it's shallow, but that's what I like.

Sooo, LC was working last night, Ryan and Lindsay and I went to see Georgia Rule. Neither of them wanted to see it, but they humored me because it was Mother's Day weekend. OMG, they just hated it, and I have to admit the acting was really schmarmy, and the storyline was unbelievably hokey, but hey, I was raised on movies like Tammy and Beach Blanket Bingo, and then went on to be a huge fan of flicks like Smokey and the Bandit, so this wasn't a stretch for me. And they had some really cute clothes and jewelry, but poor Jane Fonda, she is so weathered and so skinny that in some of the scenes she looked like a skeleton. She did have a couple of cute tshirts though. *grin*

I'm outta here, time for a hot bath and bed. Cya round the water cooler... Oh, oh, hair update... After several washings with Tide and Dawn, it's now faded to a more natural honey red toned color. It's not scary bad anymore, thank goodness, I may even leave it this way for a bit. Or I may not, I'm so fickle, who knows....

Well this is the STUPIDEST thing I think I've ever done....

Now I've done some pretty lamebrain things in my time, but I'm hot kidding, this tops them all!! I was reading online about haircolor, and people were talking about ColorSilk Strawberry Blonde, they LO-V-E-D it, and since I come from a family of redheads I've been toying for years with the idea of a soft red. So I decided that it's now or never. Trust me, I shoulda chosen NEVER!!! Holy Batman and Robin, I colored it yesterday and it is the most gawdawful color you've ever seen. I look like CarrotTop! Oh it's BAD, BAD, BAD, ladies. At first, it didn't look too bad, but it seemed the later in the day it got, the redder it got. It was totally copper in the back - LC said it was wayyy redder than his ever was.

So I put in a quick S.O.S. to my hairdresser, she said to wash it in Dawn or wash it in Tide. Well, yesterday I washed it in Dawn, it faded it a bit, and this morning I washed it in Tide. I'm going to wash it again later in the day. She said I had to get it faded quite a bit before I put blonde on it, so I guess I'm stuck for awhile. I just won't leave the house, that's what I'll do...

Now if I was in my younger years, I would be in a TOTAL panic!!! But at my age, it's like, "Oh what the hell".... I'm gonna put some fake and bake on, maybe the tan will offset the red...

The color is so bad, I won't even a post a picture of myself - OH, WHATEVER WAS I THINKING?????

My friend, Cindy, sent me this - had to share!!!!

So, we had this great 10 year old cat named Jack who just recently died.
Jack was a great cat and the kids would carry him around and sit on him
and nothing ever bothered him. He used to hang out and nap all day long
on this mat in our bathroom.

Well we have 3 kids and at the time of this story they were 4 years old,
3
years old and 1 year old. The middle one is Eli. Eli really loves
chapstick.
LOVES it. He kept asking to use my chapstick and then losing it. So
finally one day I showed him where in the bathroom I keep my chapstick
and how he could use it whenever he wanted to but he needed to put it
right back in the drawer when he was done.

Last year on Mother's Day, we were having the typical rush around and
try to get ready for church with everyone crying and carrying on. My two
boys are fighting over the toy in the cereal box. I am trying to nurse
my little one at the same time I am putting on my make-up. Everything is
a mess and everyone has long forgotten that this is a wonderful day to
honor me and the amazing job that is motherhood.

We finally have the older one and the baby loaded in the car and I am
looking for Eli. I have searched everywhere and I finally round the
corner to go into the bathroom. And there was Eli. He was applying my
chapstick very carefully to Jack's . . . rear end. Eli looked right into
my eyes and said "chapped." Now if you have a cat, you know that he is
right--their little butts do look pretty chapped. And, frankly, Jack
didn't seem to mind.
And the only question to really ask at that point was whether it was the
FIRST time Eli had done that to the cat's behind or the hundredth.
And THAT is my favorite Mother's Day moment ever because it reminds us
that no matter how hard we try to civilize these glorious little
creatures, there will always be that day when you realize they've been
using your chapstick on the cat's butt.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

Old women shouldn't wear swimsuits....

That darned Hooterville was making fun of those swimsuits (read her comment on the swimsuit post below). Well, I wouldn't wear one either, in fact, I don't know why I even posted that stupid entry. Had a huge brain f*rt I guess. They are pretty ugly. And speaking of clothes this brings me to something I've been meaning to tell you all about for weeks now.

Tummy Tuck jeans. I read about them in MORE Magazine - they are supposed to make you look like you are wearing a size smaller jeans. Well Jeez Louise, what a crock that was!

I was in Nashville a few weeks ago shopping with my Dillys, and Tonia had already scouted out those jeans, except I don't know why cause her tummy is flat as a board, but anyhoo, I grabbed them, didn't even look at the $85 pricetag - hey if they look good and make you look a size smaller, who cares how much they cost. So I'm off to the dressing room, put them on and started laughing. They have wide band of something that crisscrosses around your stomach that holds you in, it's probably 3-4 inches wide, and all it does is shove the fat above it and below it. And it HURTS! It's painful having that tight band around your tummy. So much for that. I guess if you were a size 6 it would be okay, but it's back to Ralph Lauren Saturday Jeans for me, they always seem to fit really well.

Here is their website if you want to check them out - they look actually great, but if you buy them and they don't work "told ya so!"

Just a little input....

If I have any plus-size readers that heaven forbid have to buy a bathing suit, there are lots to choose from here. Thank goodness those days are behind me, I shudder at the thought of suiting up...

Anyhoo, some of the styles posted here are pretty darned cute, actually! No, not for girls my Dilly's ages, don't even bother clicking the link, you will hate everything, I'm talking OLDER women who don't have it to flaunt anymore, or have TOO much to flaunt...

Check out these styles, old women *tehehehe*

I doubt that ANYBODY feels sorry for Paris Hilton...

I was actually gleeful when this verdict was handed down. Do I feel bad about the fact that I relish the idea of her going to prison. Nope, I sure don't. This overpriviledged, self-indulgent, obnoxious little "princess" got what she deserved. Pampered her entire life, oblivious to the feelings of other people, she "thought" she was above the law. She not only ignored the fact that her license was revolked and drove drunk anyway, she blew off court ordered alcohol classes AND had the audacity to show up late for her hearing yesterday! How STUPID is that!!! Well she sure got put in her place.

I will NEVER forget seeing her on television, talking to two less attractive girls. And saying in that whiney little voice, "don't be jealous." Meaning, don't be jealous of ME! Well I guess they aren't jealous NOW! Oh, that p*ssed me off when she said that, I was thinking, you stupid, STUPID, little vaporhead, who do you think you are? She's gonna be a prison beotch, that's what she's gonna be!!!!!!!! Oh those prison bull dykes are gonna love her!!! Talk about a Kodak moment!!! Excuse my profanity laced rant girlfriends, but sometimes you just gotta tell it like it is!

I thought the following article was an interesting read...

Reprinted from TMZ blogsite -

Reopened in March, 2006, CRDF is located in beautiful Lynwood,Calif. -- just minutes from nearby Compton! While Mr. Chow takeout isn't available, according to the AP, CRDF does serve three low-sodium poultry based meals a day. Yum! For her own safety, Paris will most likely be segregated from the rest of her prison pals and live in a one or two-person cell. Cozy. During her days at Chez Clink, Paris will get just one hour a day to shower, exercise, watch TV or talk on the phone. And sorry to say, Blackberries are not allowed. Oh, the humanity!

As for wardrobe choices, Paris will have the option of one of four different colored jumpsuits. Depending on how she is classified and where she is housed in the facility, Paris could don a blue, brown, white or classic orange one-piece from the House of Detention collection.

Paris better get crackin', because with June 5 fast approaching, it gives her just one month to plan her kick-ass going away party!

37 Looks SO OOO good on you, Girlfriend!!!!!!!

Thanks to MoJackson, Kathryn Balint and Kel Sauvage for the great elements used in making this graphic.

Just another day in the life....

I'm the world's worst at remembering birthdays. I remember the month, just not the day. So, naturally I'm texting Ang last week asking her which day her birthday is. I remembered first week in May but not the date. Amazing, huh, since I've only been friends with her, like FOREVER!!! So she texts me back May 2nd, and I write it on my calendar reminder.

I get up this morning at 6:30 am, bake her a cake, have it iced by 7:30, kitchen cleaned up and I'm calling her at 8:AM, singing her Happy Birthday! After I get the the whole little ditty sang, ya, it was offkey, anyway she starts laughing and says that her birthday isn't until Friday. ...FRIDAY, HELLOOOOOO. I could have sworn she said it was the 2nd, not the 5th. Holy Crap I did it again! I must have read that text message with my glasses off!

Naturally LC wanted me to let him eat the cake and bake Ang another one Friday. In his dreams. IN-HIS-DREAMS!!!

It just goes from bad to worse....

According to the gossip rags, guess who is the frontrunner to replace Rosie on The View??? Rosanne Barr! Now that should really bring some class to the show. Egads, girlfriends, this will turn it into a Jerry Springer wannabee. They also said Elizabeth Ditzelbeck is 3 months preggers and they will announce it this morning.

For you...

One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water.

At the end of the long walks from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.

For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water.

Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments.

But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do.

After two years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream.
"I am ashamed of myself, bec ause this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house."

The old woman smiled, "Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot's side?"

"That's because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them."

"For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table.

Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house."

Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it's the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding.

You've just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them.

SO, to all of my crackpot friends, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers on your side of the path!

Oh, well now this just makes my day...

Television therapist Dr. Phil McGraw revealed that Alec Baldwin had called him for advice on Thursday and that the two had a "far-reaching, intense conversation" about the actor's daughter and his former spouse.

Boy, the bloviator is really desperate. He's calling Dr. Phil. I actually sat here and laughed out loud. Dr. Phil is about as pathetic as Alec Baldwin. Hmmmmmmm, as Dr. Phil would say, "What's your PAYOFF Baldwin?" Public sympathy? Good luck with that, dude... Not from this corner of my little world. Stupid moron....